Broken Wings
by Anom
Summary: What if Robin never escaped Slade's control, but instead was broken? When Terra enters the picture, how will Robin's involvement change things, or will it at all?
1. Chapter 1

We've all pondered what would happen if Robin hadn't escaped the Apprentice situation. Here, I'm taking it farther, and going through Terra's story arch, but with Robin still under Slade's control. How will this change events? Will it really change anything at all? Will I perhaps write two different endings, an epilogue, and a separate, alternate storyline for this plot?

Yes

But this it the beginning.

EDIT - added linesi n to indicate POV change or scnene change because was being a bitch and wouldn't let em double space things.

Fixed small grammar errors

* * *

He was crawling through the mud, the rain pounding on his battered body like a thousand punches, as if he had not already been punished enough this night. Digging his fingers into the mud, the boy once called Robin pulled himself under a log and rolled onto his back, gasping in every breath like it was the most difficult thing he had ever done. He could hear footsteps not too far away, and muffled voices of those searching for him. Ironically it was his new uniform that let him remain hidden, though it was torn and beaten as badly as he was.

Black and dark orange blended easier into mud than red and green, after all.

* * *

"Robin..."

Starfire walked farther away from the group, stepping up to her ankles in the river, and peered into the shadows. Balancing carefully on the treacherous and slippery rocks, she braced against the quickening current. Raising her green glowing fist, she tried to illuminate the area, looking for any sign of him. A heavy hand settled on her shoulder,

"He ain't out here any more Star. I don't know how he got away after alla that, but he did."

A shadow behind them melted upward, forming into a solid being. Raven looked up from beneath her hood darkly,

"He's got to be here somewhere, no one could run that fast with that many injuries. Beast Boy, can't you smell him?"

The green bloodhound shifted back into Beast Boy, shaking his head and sending water in all directions,

"There's too much mud and rain, any scent gets washed away too fast to be clear."

Starfire continued looking, refusing to believe he was gone again,

"No, Robin is still here." She turned to Cyborg, and he was surprised by the utter lack of emotion in her eyes, "Most likely he is hiding, we only have to find him."

Starfire wouldn't admit it, but she imagined how she felt inside at that moment was what it felt like to die. She wondered, briefly, if Robin was feeling the same in his probably wretched hiding place, then dashed the thought. The Titans had discussed this many times, and only a few days before they had finally managed to say what all of them had feared for the months Robin had been lost: There was no reason for him to stay with Slade unless he had chosen to. Robin had betrayed them

He had fought her like any other foe, so she had fought back accordingly, as she must.

Beast Boy stuck an accusing finger at Raven, who promptly ignored him.

"Hey Raven, can't you like, find his mind or something? Why do I have to be the one sticking my nose in the mud?"

Raven cast a long suffering look at Beast Boy and explained slowly,

"To enter someone's mind I have to go through their physical body. Meaning if I could find Robin's mind we wouldn't even need me to be able to do so."

Scratching his head, Beast Boy shook water from his skin again and morphed into a crow, taking flight and renewing his search. The other Titans took a long look at each other, than split up again, finding no comfort in each others presence. In fact, they felt quite the opposite, as everyone saw in the others eyes the final acceptance of the situation and, knowing that same look was in their own eyes, couldn't help but feel guilty.

* * *

He listened to the voices, wishing there was even a hint of worry in them, something to give him hope. But there was none. Not anymore. This fight had changed everything, and it was this night that any chance of redemption was lost to him. Slade had sent him out again, and Robin had, with a look at the monitors of his friends blood, obeyed. The robbery had gone well, he had been undetected. That is, until he was on the final stretch home, running through the woods.

A beam of energy had vaporized the tree in front of him, Cyborg's sonic cannon. He had turned and seen his old team in the pouring rain, illuminated eerily by the green glow of Starfire's ready and waiting Starbolts. Slade's voice had crooned into his ear, commanding him like all the times before to attack, but Robin's feet had already been moving.

Viciously diving at his friends, Robin had thrown himself into the fight completely, only thinking that he had to finish it quickly and return to Slade's lair, perhaps this night he would find his chance for freedom. Or, perhaps, given a few more days, his friends might detect the sinister threat lurking in their blood. These thoughts had been faint in mind, however, as he on some level found these encounters thrilling.

The team had seemed unusually fierce this time, Robin had vaguely noticed when Cyborg did not hold back on his deadly cannon and Beast Boy barely missed snapping him in two with a T Rex's jaws. But it hadn't seemed like something for concern at the time, and so Robin countered each attack expertly. As the many times before, Robin easily avoided and countered his friends attacks, he knew them too well to be caught off guard.

But it wasn't an attack the caught him off guard. Starfire swooped in low, flinging energy down at him, and Robin leapt up to her level, swinging his leg out and catching the side of her face. Grunting as the metal bruised her jaw, Starfire steadied and threw herself back into the fight. As she closed in again, persistent, Robin turned and braced for her attack.

He had a split second to look into Starfire's eyes, and what he had seen had frozen him instantly. Not noticing the repeated Starbolts hitting his chest, tearing his uniform and flesh, Robin found his mind unable to forget the image of Starfire's eyes. The steely look there, the hard, uncaring gleam in them as she yelled and threw her foot into his stomach hurt more than anything that was about to be done to him. Starfire had given up on him. She was fighting the way she always fought against the forces of evil, forces she now believed Robin had given himself completely to.

From there, the fight went badly for Robin. Going numb within, he could only dwell on the look on Starfire's face, the look, he realized, that all his teammates shared. Raven threw him into the air and let him drop the punishing height, nearly breaking him. Cyborg mercilessly beat him, bloodying his nose, splitting his lip, blacking his eyes, and did not stop there. Beast Boy hurled him through the trunk of a tree and Robin barely escaped the follow up charge.

Stumbling, Robin found himself unable to muster the will to fight. Hits that he should have bounced back from sent him hurtling to the ground, where he barely managed to rise only in time to receive another hit. And it was silent. There were no pleas from any of them begging him to explain or to return to them, not even the witty remarks they shot at criminals to raise their ire. This fight was silent save for the yells of attack and the pained grunts that forced their way out of Robin's throat.

Somewhere, Robin began to fear for his life. As the fight dragged on, he felt himself slipping more, his entire body screamed in agony, wanting nothing more than to submit to unconsciousness. But would his friends stop with knocking him out? Or were they now determined to finish this once and for all? It was that uncertainty that kept Robin from giving up completely, hoping he would wake up on a hospital bed with them looking down at him. And even if that happy fantasy came true, he reminded himself as he ducked behind a tree desperately to avoid Raven's dark energies, Slade would annihilate the Teen Titans while he watched. He was lucky Slade hadn't taken the fight into his own hands already.

Fearing, for himself and his friends, Robin broke into a last ditch attempt to escape. There were no fancy flips, no quick footed jumps from tree to tree, only a battered child running and tripping over his own feet beneath the darkened trees, desperate and defeated. He could hear the others close behind, and panicked. He couldn't outrun them, not in his condition. So he hid. Throwing himself down a sloping riverbank, Robin found himself in the washed up muck and refuse of a river being nursed to life by the storm. Lying on the stoney bank, he groaned up at a dark sky that did not care for his agony. Knowing he could not afford to stay where he was, he pulled himself the last stretch to a pile of logs and forced his way under them, getting coated in mud on the way and receiving nasty cuts and bruises from the sticks that shared his hiding place.

And there he lay now, listening to his former friend's hunt for him, wishing that he could call out to them, needing their help now more than ever before and knowing that he could never again receive it. They searched for hours, sometimes calling out for him, sometimes in that same cold silence as before. Starfire walked right past him at one point, her feet passing close enough that Robin could have reached out and touched them, but she had moved on again, taking flight and scanning the woods. Gradually, the voices died down. The sounds of search vanished and all Robin could hear was his own ragged breathing and the heavy patter of rain. The Titans had given up the search. He was alone.

* * *

Later, the rain falling heavier, Robin leaned on a branch, gasping in a wheezing breathe, feeling a broken rib jabbing under his skin. When he coughed, Robin saw a few spatters of blood fall to the muddy ground. Leaning heavily on a tree for support, he seemed to fall from tree to tree rather than walk as he made his way back to the only home he had now. He had been so tempted to lie there in the mud, to let himself slip away and perhaps never awaken. It would be a welcome reprieve, and he wondered if such a fate was now his only chance of ever finding peace again. But he had thought again of the probes in his friends' bodies, and knew Slade was monitoring his vital signs. Slade would know he had purposely given up, and his former team would pay the penalty. Even now, Robin could not condemn them so. So he had pushed himself up, and from the mud and water had risen a different person, a Robin that knew he had no team, but still was burdened with the responsibility of protecting them.

When he rose from the earth that night, he had finally been broken. Not by Slade's mind games, not by the brutal beatings he received from his new Master, but by the very people he was giving his life to protect. Slade had not said a word into his headset since the beginning of the fight, but he was waiting at the door when Robin finally arrived. Stumbling through a bad dream, Robin collapsed at the feet of the monster who had caused it all, helpless and finally accepting what could not be changed.

* * *

Slade looked down as Robin finally fell. He dropped to one knee and reached out, almost gently petting Robin's hair. It was a gesture that, from anyone else, would have been both welcome and comforting. As it was, Robin groaned and flinched as though he wanted to pull away, but he was in no condition to do so. Not taking his hand away, Slade began to speak and his voice, always sinister yet playful, now sounded unusually grave,

"They've given up on you, Robin, you never counted on that, did you?"

Robin stirred, grinding his teeth together, still trying to muster the strength to move. He only managed to clench his fists. Slade continued softly, cruelly,

"You've nothing now, no hope. They'll never think to look for the hidden threat, because they believe there is none. They'll never think to rescue you, because they don't think you want it."

His teeth were starting to hurt he was clenching them together so tightly. Robin spat angrily, watching flecks of blood fly off his lips as he did so,

"Damn you..."

"That's my boy."

Momentarily Slade tightened his grip, digging his fingers into Robin's scalp. Then he thought better of whatever he was about to do, and instead picked Robin up, ignoring the cry of pain the movement elicited.

* * *

Being taken in out of the rain should have been a relief, but Robin felt nothing but the shame of being so helpless, of having to rely on Slade to bandage his injuries. Lying on his back, Robin stared up, his sight blurring now that his eyes had started to swell from Cyborg's beating. A swab of something stung against his face. Slade looked over each injury as he tended them, identifying which Titan it had come from. The burn on Robin's shoulder, cauterized in an instant: Cyborg. The still bubbling, blackened flesh that streaked across his chest several times: Raven. Claw marks: Beast Boy. A circle of bruising, the skin red, almost broken: Starfire.

Wrapping the boy's certainly dislocated wrist, Slade spoked in conversational tones,

"How does it feel, knowing that I'm the only person you have left?"

Robin's muscles tensed, and he choked,

"You...did this to me..."

"You dove into that fight before I had even started to tell you to. You were enjoying it, Robin, for the most part. Then the endorphin suddenly dropped, and you started to lose. Was that the instant you realized they'd abandoned you? When you realized that, no matter how many times you face them, no matter how hard you fight for their sake, you'll always end up back at my feet?"

There was nothing Robin could say back to that. As much as it hurt to admit, everything Slade said was right. The ministrations continued in silence, Robin having no will to speak, and Slade content with his subservience.

* * *

Rah, angst. Robin loves his angst, and we love him for it.

The next chapter will probably have Terra's first appearance, and more Robin angst, and probably beatings as well. And maybe a Titans cameo where they angst but pretend not to.


	2. Chapter 2

People love character torturing, don't they?

So many positive reviews, I'm glad you all like this. To Remix17(cool, I'm a big fan of your stories!) as I said, there are a few different ways this story will go, and the endings range form horrifically depressing with character death to pretty happy, to kind of happy but still kind of sad.

I'll be writing the horrifically sad one first, just so you know.

Actually, I was thinking about it, and it turns out Terra won't show up until chapter 3, this is a transition chapter.

Enjoy. You know you will.

* * *

"We had 'im, I can't believe he got away!"

A resounding crash echoed in the main room of Titans tower as Cyborg slammed his fists into the counter top. The other Titans flinched in unison, scattered around the room in morose silence.

On the couch, Starfire hung her head in her hands,

"Perhaps...we hurt him too grievously..."

"Robin wouldn't die from just that." Raven spoke his name while everyone else had danced around it, and the effect was not unlike a physical blow to each of them. Ignoring the obvious discomfort she was causing the others, Raven continued as if she didn't care, as if she was talking about any other villain,

"Right now he's hiding in Slade's lair, waiting until he's well enough to get back at us." She looked around at each of them, "And don't think he won't, we all know how much Robin hates to lose."

"He will...revenge upon us?"

Raven nodded once, heedless of the look on Starfire's face. The alien looked down to the floor, unable to imagine Robin actually seeking them out. All their encounters were when they caught up with him, he seemed to be doing his best to stay out of their way. Whatever that might mean.

"Do you think he will really..."

Another loud crash made them all jump, and the Titans turned to see Cyborg pulling his fist back from what used to be their fridge. Cyborg turned on the girls, rubbing his hand as if he could feel the effects of the impact, his frustration being brought forcefully under control. He looked up, and for a moment, his human eye was so emotionless that Starfire wasn't sure which eye she was looking in to.

"He will, Star, and I'm sorry. We talked about this before, Robin's just another criminal now and he tried to hurt us, maybe worse. Who knows what else he'll do?"

Across the room, Beast Boy nodded somberly, taking up the thought,

"We've gotta stop him before he does something horrible."

Starfire nodded,

"I know this is true. I do. But I do not wish to kill..."

Again speaking frankly, harshly, Raven said it like it was regardless of anyones feelings. Even her own.

"None of us do. And we won't. But if we go into a fight like we're just trying to subdue him, we won't win. We have to fight Robin harder than any other villain or he'll just get away again."

Cyborg started to pace, rambling,

"Man, I can't believe he got away...I just...he...rrrgh!" Frustrated, Cyborg couldn't even talk coherently. Calming, he asked,

"So how long do you think until he's back on his feet?"

Raven thought it over, considering the amount of damage she'd alone done to him, regardless of what everyone else had, it would be awhile.

"A few weeks, maybe sooner if he pushes himself, and I'm pretty sure he will."

Starfire stood and clasped her hands in front of her. Carefully guarding her voice, she barely spoke above a whisper, as if she didn't trust herself to speak louder.

"At our next encounter we must ensure that Robin does not escape. He is...too dangerous to leave free now. If our city is to be safe once more, we must stop him."

Beast Boy punched his palm in a gesture of bravado that he did not feel,

"And then we'll make him tell us where Slade is and kick his butt halfway across the city!"

Beast Boy, seeing no one respond to his confidence, let his ears droop. Crossing the room, he seated himself on the arm of the couch and joined the other Titans in silence, thinking. A few moments later, he spoke up, and everyone listened.

"What I don't get, though, is...you guys remember when we fought and Robin did that 'glowy hurty thingy' to us? How come he hasn't done it since? Wouldn't it be easier than fighting?"

Cyborg offered an explanation.

"Maybe he wants to beat us on his own. That sounds like him, don't it?"

"But surely he would use such a weapon if he could." Starfire reasoned, "When it became apparent we were winning, why did he not strike?" She paused, and answered her own question hesitantly,

"Perhaps he is not the one wielding that attack."

Raven sliced the air in front of her, a gesture that brought the finality of her words home.

"It doesn't matter, we can't do anything to defend ourselves against it, so the sooner we bring him down, the better."

The other Titans nodded mutely.

It was Cyborg who broke the long silence that followed. Crossing his arms, he spoke authoritatively,

"All right team, we still have a city to defend, and crime ain't gonna stop because we lost a member. Let's get out there and do our jobs."

Grimly, mechanically, they exited the tower as if the alarm had gone off, hoping they could find some crime to stop, if only to distract them. Leaving last, Starfire paused to send a glance toward the closed doors that led to Robin's room. With a sigh and shake of her head, she kicked off into the air and hurried after her friends.

* * *

There were no words to describe the humiliation of being nursed back to health by his most hated enemy. But Robin couldn't refuse, he couldn't afford to. Of course, 'nursed' back to health meant that as soon as he wouldn't bleed to death overnight Slade left him to his own devices. By morning Robin couldn't move he was in so much pain, but his body would heal in time.

But the physical pain wasn't the worst part, not by far. Since becoming Slade's apprentice, Robin had far too much time to think, to dwell on anything and everything. Lying in bed, waiting to heal, he found himself again alone in his thoughts, and they predictably ran down the same path they always did. To exactly how he had managed to end up this way.

He remembered it all so vividly, the night he'd fallen. He could almost smell the dank sewer they'd been running through, searching for a Chronoton detonator that hadn't really existed. How could he have known that it was really him Slade wanted?

He'd taken their friendships for granted, and in those days leading to the detonator threat, he'd almost seen their friendship as an annoyance. Painfully, Robin remembered how he acted towards the Titans, snubbing them to search through newspapers and magazines, refusing their help and concern almost violently. He'd been so obsessed with finding Slade, not knowing that Slade was obsessed with finding him as well, that he'd again forgotten he was part of a team. They were right, he _had_ been acting like Slade.

"_Robin, we are victorious."_

"_Slade's got his finger on the button and we've got nothing. Does that sound like a victory to you?!"_

If only he'd let the others help, if only he hadn't insisted on fighting Cinderblock on his own. He'd made the decision to hunt down Slade alone, and as much as he hated to admit it, he hadn't wanted to take any of the others with him because he had honestly thought they would be of no use to him. He thought he could stop Slade on his own. This was all his fault, he'd dug his own grave. Slade was Slade, he would always be trying to destroy something, it was Robin's job to lead his team and stop him. He had failed.

"_Robin!"_

"_Get the detonator! GO!"_

God, had that really been the last thing he'd ever said to her? Of all the things he could have said, the things he should have told her, the only thing he'd thought to do was order her to leave him alone. Purposely sending the team away, how could he have been such an idiot...

It was his own arrogance that had been his downfall. He knew that now. He just couldn't handle the thought of not being the one to win. He'd let Slade get to him, played right into every manipulating word and scheme. He'd gotten angry and careless during their fight. Slade's calm and calculated taunts had been infuriating, and even though Robin had attacked as viciously as he knew how it still hadn't been enough. Rather, it had been exactly what Slade had wanted.

Sick of dwelling on this over and over, Robin tried to get out of bed. He managed to roll over, but couldn't push himself up, so instead ended up lying on his stomach with an arm and leg hanging over the side of the bed. That proved to be uncomfortable very quickly, and he opted to roll the rest of the way onto the floor instead of staying there.

At lest the pain upon impact was a temporary reprieve from his thoughts. As the initial impact faded, Robin found himself more uncomfortable with the cold, unyielding floor bothering him as well as his injuries.

"_You told me I wasn't ready, didn't you, Bruce?"_

He thought miserably, remembering all too clearly the disapproval his teacher had voiced when Robin had so proudly proclaimed he wanted to lead his own team.

"_Told me I was too young, I couldn't handle the responsibility, and even if I could, you said 'Joining a team is foolish, leading one is suicide.'"_

They'd argued over it, as much as one could argue with someone as cold and withdrawn as BatmanIn the end he hadn't been able to refuse Robin's ambition, and even if he had, they both knew it wouldn't have done him any good to say 'no'. Robin had been too sure of himself to let his mentor's misgivings stand in his way, he was ready to prove himself.

"_...And look at me now...Robin, the great leader, too weak to even climb back into bed. Fine, you were right, ok? Is that what you want to hear?"_

Of course Bruce had been right.

"_I was stupid, and arrogant...and...."_

But he'd known that the only way Robin would learn was to try, and he'd let him go.

"_And you said you wouldn't be there to bail me out."_

He'd laughed and told Batman he wouldn't need bailing out.He'd even taken the time to check in once in awhile, to subtly brag about how well he was doing in Jump City. And Batman had, recently, seemed proud of him. Robin groaned and pulled his knees up to his chest, having endured too much to be ashamed by his next realization.

"_I'm ready to be rescued."_

He'd already failed to free himself. His team had been his downfall, like Batman had warned him. If your nemesis ever finds out who you care for, they will use it against you. That was why Bruce had a secret identity, that was why Robin used to not make friends while in costume.

"_I'm ready to be lectured on what a failure I was as a leader, on how childish I was, how naive and proud and unprepared...I'll accept all of it. I just need you to be here for me now."_

"Please...."

The sudden sound startled Robin, who hadn't intended to speak aloud, especially in such a frail, desperate voice. It scared him.

"_There's no on else I can turn to now, Bruce."_

But the room was still silent, and Robin's pleas disappeared into the empty air. His mentor could not hear him, and his friends refused to. No help was coming.

* * *

No one had entered his room for weeks, rather, they avoided the door however they could. It was as if merely acknowledging the existence of that door would bring down some horrible curse on them all. At the very least, it would make them think about something they were trying their hardest to put to rest. Starfire wondered, as she ran her hand down the cool metal, over the nameplate that boldly declared it to be Robin's room, why they couldn't bring themselves to empty the room if it brought them all so much pain.

It certainly hurt her to be here, but she hadn't been able to stop herself. Sleep had refused to come to her, every time the Tamaranian closed her eyes she was looking into his expressionless mask again, wondering what was in his eyes that he always needed so badly to hide. Tossing and turning, suffering in silence until the earliest hours of the morning, Starfire had finally given up on rest and taken to wandering the dark and empty halls of Titan's Tower. Painfully, she had recalled other times sleep had been difficult to come by, when she could sneak into Robin's room. Sometimes he was awake when she entered quietly, typing at his computer or digging through his files, but he always made time for her those nights. Other times he was sleeping, and she would climb into bed, doing her best not to wake him but always failing.

The doors slid open, and Starfire wished more than anything that Robin would be there tonight, to hold her in his arms, to joke about how he would never get any work done if she kept doing this. But she was greeted only by darkness. The computer was off, a thin layer of dust lying undisturbed on it, it was the same for the file cabinets and papers still strewn about on the desk. She remembered back on that fateful night, they had left in such a hurry, eager to save their city and not even considering the danger they would be putting themselves in. Nothing in the room had been moved since then, perhaps in memory, perhaps because it was just too painful to be here.

She knew she shouldn't be dwelling on this, she couldn't handle much more grief, and being in Robin's room was only making her feel worse. Bitterly, she reasoned; If Robin felt no guilt over what he had done to them, why should she feel anything for him? Why was she standing here, remembering lying next to him, remembering him helping her with her English, remembering battles fought side by side, remembering countless times he had been there for her and she had returned the favor, the way they had found such strength from their friendship.

Where had things gone wrong?

Holding herself, Starfire weakly slumped to the floor, her eyes beginning to tear up and the unmistakable tightening in her chest that alluded to grief so strong it was almost as a physical thing trying blocking her throat. Starfire leaned her face on the bed, still able to faintly smell him there, and twined her fingers in the sheets. Unable to hold it in any longer, Starfire sobbed into the sheets,

"Why, Robin? Why did you leave your friends...why did you leave me?"

The faint light coming in from the living room was briefly blocked, and Starfire heard cautious footsteps behind her. Feeling ashamed to be found here in this state, she buried her face into the cloth, willing whichever of her teammates it was to just go away. Beast Boy, anything but a mind reader, only saw a friend in need of comfort, and acted as any friend would.

"Star..."

Sucking in a breath between subdued sobs, Starfire pleaded,

"Please, leave me in isolation Beast Boy. I do not wish to be seen."

Beast Boy pulled his hand back and instead dropped down next to her, wondering if she would accept a hug or if she really did want to be alone. He hadn't expected a mid night snack to lead to this. Looking away, he listened to Starfire quietly continue to cry, each sniffle making him flinch.

"Don't do this to yourself," He practically begged. They were all still depressed, but he couldn't stand seeing Starfire like this. She was supposed to be happy, she was...Starfire. Seeing her like this, and knowing it was Robin's fault, Beast Boy was more surprised than he should have been by the sudden flare of anger, almost hatred, that accompanied the thought of Robin now.

"There's nothing you could have done to help him."

Sitting back on her legs, Starfire pulled the bed sheets with her, clinging tightly to them. A few stray tears still falling and her voice trembling, Starfire nodded.

"I know, Beast Boy. I know that I cannot change what Robin has chosen, but I will never see why he did so."

"...maybe someday we can ask him ourselves."

Suddenly somber, Starfire shook her head slowly, though the quaver in her voice was still apparent. She was barely keeping herself from breaking out into tears again.

"I do not think I wish to know why."

Watching Starfire, Beast Boy made a bold move and ventured to reach out and pull her close in what he hoped was a comforting hug. Starfire immediately leaned into him gratefully, speaking into his chest.

"He was my...best friend..."

Nuzzling her hair, Beast Boy held her tightly, as much for her comfort as his own.

"The rest of us are still here for you, Star. We won't leave you."

She looked up, and though there were fresh tears in her eyes, there was also gratitude.

"Thank you."

* * *

Overdone angst?

This is the darkest thing I've written so far, and I'm trying to keep that line between cool angst and whining.

Oh, and on Starfire sneaking into Robin's room, it was not meant in a sexual manner. More like how a little kid wants to sleep with an older sibling or a friend.


	3. Chapter 3

Sarah - Ah, Robin/Terra? Perhaps, perhaps. If not here, than somewhere else. I'll guiltily admit that I like that pairing as well. Not as much as Robin/Star, but that's difficult in Robin's current situation, ni?

Kaliann - That's interesting, but I can't see Robin willingly putting one of his friends through what he's going through. I guess if he got lonely enough he might consider it, but by the time he lost enough of his morals to consider that, I don't think he'd really want to see his old friends again.

Wrongful Vanity - Yeah, I'm interested in more Terra/Robin interaction, he kind of ignored her in the show.

Remix17 - Well of course he gets both! And how cool is that?

Person - Batman...you'll have to wait and see. And I agree, pure romance stories usually suck, but I think a good component of a lot of stories is the complications romance brings. After all, what is the source of Starfire's excellent angst at the moment? Romance. Ah hah, I have you there.

Yeah, trauma abounding.

DemonicK - I'm honored you like it enough to reconsider an entire genre. Squee for me!

Oh, and I promise Robin won't get beaten up as much after this chapter. I swear I didn't realize exactly how much I was abusing him until I'd written out the beginning.

He needs a break.

Edited to fix some of the dialogue that was cut out in the upload process. Added a few paragraphs.

* * *

_Thud Thud Smack_

Punch, jab, kick. Repeat.

Methodically, Robin attacked the punching bag as he had been for hours. When he wasn't out stealing, he spent his time in the gym training, regularly working himself into the ground. It was far preferable to training with Slade, who gave no quarter during their sparring and left Robin bruised and frustrated every time. Panting and ignoring the sweat running into his eyes, Robin renewed his attack, absorbed in his routine. This was his peace now, his reprieve, when he could focus on the bag in front of him and the satisfaction of feeling it yield to his strength. He paused, leaning on the bag and breathing deeply, catching his breath.

It had been weeks since his last encounter with the Titans, and he had made a full recovery. Mostly. Pushing away from the punching bag, Robin wiped sweat from his face and stood before a mirror, seeing reminders of that last fight still very noticeable across his bare chest. He traced a trail of misshapen flesh down to where it crossed with glaring claw marks, and then over to small bumps where his ribs had healed slightly misaligned. With a small shock, Robin realized that he was not dreading their next fight because it meant he would be fighting his friends, but because he was scared of getting hurt again. He'd never been so badly injured in any fight, and it had been a brutal reminder of exactly how frail he was. A human playing way past his limits.

Still looking into the mirror, Robin could see other difference these lonely months had made on him. He was stronger than ever before, and it showed on the curves of his arms and chest, but still lean, stemming from a certain disregard for his own well being and no more late night pizza and ice-cream runs with the team. It was almost like looking at a stranger, looking into that mirror. Everything about him was unrecognizable, down to just the way he held himself. Even standing in contemplation he looked aggressive, ready to attack in an instant with deadly force. There was a constant scowl on his face, and he could almost see the bitterness in his eyes through his mask.

Even the way he fought had changed drastically, Slade had seen to that. Now he fought not to subdue, but to inflict maximum damage, regardless of the welfare of his opponent. He wasn't exactly sure how badly he had hurt the guards unlucky enough to get in the way of his robberies, but he was pretty sure some of them wouldn't be continuing in that line of work.

Running his fingers through his hair, Robin turned away from the reflection and picked up the top of his uniform. Walking through the silent halls, the sound of his footfalls his only and constant companion, he made for his room to go to bed. Whatever the next day would bring, he didn't bother wondering. He could be left on his own for another day of training himself into exhaustion, or he could be sent stealing, perhaps to fight his old friends. At this point it made no difference to him.

Slade had remarkably few tasks for him these past few weeks, and Robin was largely left alone. While he was tempted to be relieved by this, he knew that Slade's inactivity only meant he had something grander planned. And when it was finally put into effect, he would be a part of it.

* * *

As the sun began to sink on the horizon, the world began to cool, and Terra remembered why she didn't like deserts. Blistering hot during the day, freezing at night. Sighing, she shrugged off her backpack and dug for a coat, starting to feel the cold nipping at her exposed arms. Even with the jacket on, the wind still slipped in through holes at her elbows and the open front. Terra pulled the jacket tight around her, wishing the zipper at least still worked, then she wouldn't have to hold it shut. 

Reclaiming her backpack, the young girl switched from random wandering to searching for a reasonably comfortable spot to spend the night. She was currently standing on a rocky ridge, she'd felt it when she entered the desert miles ago and used it as something to follow. Now she hoped to find a cave of some sort. She closed her eyes and relaxed, feeling the land around her, her powers sensing where there was dirt, sand or rock, where they intermingled and changed, and hopefully, where there was a tunnel in the rock around her.

What she sought was just under half a mile away, a small pocket in the stone where she could find shelter from the quickening winds. Terra hiked across sand and stone, holding a sleeve over her mouth and nose when the sands flew up in flurries with the wind. Finally she jumped down from a ledge to land before the yawning mouth of the cave she had sensed. At least her powers were reliable sometimes.

She settled into the cave, flashlight in hand, and set up her backpack as pillow. While she had thought sleep would be easy to find tonight, as soon as she clicked off the flashlight she realized how wrong she was. In the dark, with not even her wanderings to occupy her mind, she was left with memories. It had been several days since she had left the last small town she had stayed at, but the memory was still painfully fresh in her mind. Vividly, she could still remember trying to hold back a rockslide, swearing to herself that this time she would help, this time would be different . . . but then she'd felt her control slipping away again, as the power she exerted to push the earth back had backlashed.

The screaming was also quite vivid in her mind. As was the silence after the disaster she had only made worse, followed as always by the hate, the chase, the frantic fleeing. Terra pulled her legs up to her chest, hugging them in an effort to dispel her thoughts, but with no success. The movement only awoke the pain in bruises on her skin where people had hit her with fists and, as she had turned to run, rocks and anything else they could get their hands on.

A whimper escaped her lips, and Terra knew she would find no sleep tonight, or anytime in the near future.

* * *

"Apprentice." 

Robin melted out of the shadows obediently, wondering briefly where he would be breaking in tonight and if the Teen Titans would try and stop him again. But Slade had something different in mind. Pressing a button, he called up video footage of a young girl walking down a city street. The video was blurry and without sound, obviously stolen from a security camera, and Robin watched with little or no interest.

"Watch this girl."

Robin studied to fuzzy footage, making out what he could of her facial features, noting not much aside from a whip thin body and flowing blond hair. Regardless, he nodded mutely. Slade said nothing, and waited as the video played. As it continued Robin became more interested in what he was seeing. Apparently hearing something, the girl turned her head, confused. Something flew at her, clipping her above the eye, and her harassers came into view at the edge of the screen. The girl clutched at her head and started to run, but one of the boys dashed in front of her.

Wondering why Slade cared about one girl being assaulted on a street corner, Robin was both intrigued and bored by the possibilities. But he was not prepared for what he saw next. Waving her hands wildly, obviously pleading for something, the girl suddenly dropped to her knees, clutching both sides of her head like it was about to split. Even from the distance the video was from, Robin could see her eyes beginning to glow a hellish yellow.

Robin's eyes went wide of their own accord as the ground split around the girl and swallowed the cars driving by. The buildings began to crack and crumble around her, and she still knelt on the sidewalk, shaking her head and silently screaming. Robin watched in horrid fascination as the destruction increased, and was jolted when the camera suddenly collapsed and the footage ended. No longer bored, Robin looked expectantly at Slade, almost eager to know where this was headed.

"Never before have I seen such raw power. If she could be taught to harness her powers, to wield them properly . . . " He looked back to Robin, who lowered his gaze, now able to guess why he had been shown the video. With just enough snideness in his voice that he knew he could get away with, Robin quipped,

"So how am I supposed to find her? As entertaining as that video was, it didn't exactly give me a good look at her."

Slade already had more than enough information, which he now shared.

"Her name is Tara Markov. Five years ago she accidently leveled her hometown, killing several, injuring many. She's been running ever since. And right now she is camping in the desert outside our very own Jump City."

Robin looked back up, surprised by the apparent simplicity. Slade turned back to the video screen, contemplating.

"You will go to her, tell her that I can help her learn control. I have a feeling she'll jump at the offer."

"Yes, Master."

Briefly Robin wondered when it had become so easy to say that. It seemed an eternity ago, but he knew he had once fought savagely to not call Slade Master, and even after losing that battle he knew he had always spat the title with enough venom in his voice to make it anything but an honorific. Now it just seemed natural, how things were supposed to be.

How things changed in such a short time, he mused sardonically.

Feeling a sinking in the pit of his stomach, Robin nodded again and slipped back into the darkness. In a few minutes, he was running for the desert, his mind a whirl of warring thought.

* * *

Could he do this to an innocent? In his ear, Slade spoke, calmly telling him of the destruction this girl had caused, telling him everything he had found out during his extensive tracking of her. As Robin listened, a buried shred of his former self came through, and he felt pity for the lost Terra. She had no control, she had been shunned and exiled from every city or town she had ever tried to live in because of powers she had never asked for. Robin guessed she wanted nothing more than for her powers to vanish and let her live a quiet life. 

He knew Slade would give her anything but a quiet life. He knew she would be exploited, twisted the way he was being twisted. It was one thing for him to steal some new technology, it was a completely different low for him to consider imprisoning a lost runaway. His face betraying none of these thoughts and his feet unwavering as they silently moved over the cool sand, he checked a small locating device, veering toward the blinking light that marked where Terra was currently hiding. And all the while, Robin kept hearing that quiet question in the back of his mind; Was he going to do this to her? Force her into the life he was leading?

He was getting closer, there wasn't much time left to think about it, and if he stopped and pondered, Slade would know he had stopped moving and question. So he kept running, now leaping over increasingly rocky terrain while his mind argued,

_I can't do it._

_I will do it._

_Noone deserves this_

_I have to_

_I won't be able to live with myself if..._

_It's her or me_

Shaking his head to clear the thoughts, Robin checked his locator again. He was almost there. He had to make his decision. He thought again of the blurry face he had seen, the desperate child pleading for those who had attacked her to run before she unwittingly unleashed her powers. He could almost imagine the face, and found himself likening her to Starfire unconsciously. He imagined her with a certain naivety, she would cling to the first person who offered to help her because she scared and insecure, it wouldn't cross her mind that someone who held out their hand to help would have something hidden behind their back. Slade would be more than willing to take advantage of her trust. Robin imagined a girl who knew nothing of the epic good versus evil battle he and his friends had participated in, a runaway who left a trail of destruction despite her best intentions.

He couldn't do this to her.

In a split second he had decided, and Robin did not allow himself to think of the consequences that he could suffer if this went wrong. Flicking his earpiece, he activated modifications he had secretly been working on, the ability to turn off the wretched device. He had been saving the precious and costly gift of separation from Slade's watchful eyes for when he truly needed it, and now seemed like a good time. He could make up any excuse he wanted later, mechanical failure, something like that. Crouching above the cave his locator told him the girl rested in, Robin spoke as if his Master could still hear, testing his alterations,

"Slade, come in. Slade."

He repeated the name, knowing that if Slade could indeed still hear him, he could expect a fierce berating for such an informal title. There was only silence. He had done it. And now he had precious little time to save Terra from sharing his miserable fate.

Jumping down, he entered the cave, every sense on alert for Terra. The cave was dark, apparently uninhabited, but in the corner Robin caught sight of a travel-worn backpack sitting next to the nearly dead embers of a fire. Feeling no guilt about the invasion of privacy, he opened the pack. Nothing of much interest, just a flashlight, some food, a water bottle and a jacket as beaten up as the pack.

Setting it back down, Robin wondered where she was. He should have been relieved to take the chance to say he couldn't find her and go home, but he'd already cut off communications, this was the only chance he had to warn her. With an exasperated noise, he darted out of the cave, looking to the side for any sign of her.

He ended up almost running right into her instead. Catching himself, Robin skidded to a halt as Terra jumped back with a yelp of surprise. There was a pause, and Robin very quickly looked her over. She was even skinnier than she had been in the video, covered in dirt and ragged clothing. Even in the darkness her eyes shown as brilliant blue, drawing his gaze away from her battered appearance.

She'd been crying, he could see the red rim around her eyes that left no doubt, and now there was fear in those eyes. Terra started to back away, edgy and ready to run like a frightened rabbit. Robin, knowing his appearance was not that reassuring, tried his best to sound friendly. But it was difficult when he had barely spoken in months,

"Don't run, I'm not here to hurt you."

The girl halted, perhaps frozen by the harshness in his voice. Her own voice quavering, yet held strong by suspicion, she asked,

"Who are you?"

Speaking quickly, Robin shook his head, mirroring the gesture with one hand.

"That's not important. What's important is that I know who you are, Tara, and I know the problems you've been having."

Terra's eyes went wide in horror, and Robin feared he had blown it. She was going to run. But for whatever reason, more fear or even hope, her feet stayed stationary. Robin dared to take a few steps forward, watching her carefully as he got closer,

"I know you don't mean to do the things you've done, and I understand that you're scared. But I know someone who can help you."

Shattering his preconceptions about the girl, Terra suddenly narrowed her eyes and snapped defensively.

"I don't need help."

Almost cruelly, in a way that probably would have made Slade proud, Robin said matter of factly,

"The crater where there used to be Esna City told me differently."

"How did you...?"

With that, Terra blanched. The reminder of what she'd tried so hard to forget had a devastating effect, and as she trembled in shame a faint tremor ran through the ground around them. Panic lighting up her eyes, Terra looked down at the ground, her lips forming silent protests. Thankfully, the tremor quickly died down. When Terra looked back up at Robin, there was no more fight in her eyes, and she said weakly,

"I didn't mean to...I never meant..."

Somehow managing to sound reassuring, though he was very out of practice, Robin put a hand on her arm.

"I know. I know all about you, Tara, that's why I'm going to help you."

There was the smallest glimmer of hope in her eyes as soon as the words left his mouth, and Terra relaxed a bit, tempted by the idea. Even as tempted as she was, Robin still saw distrust, that well learned fear in her eyes. He couldn't realistically expect any measure of trust though, he just had to hope she was desperate enough to take his word on this. Partially wary, partially hopeful, she asked,

"You are?'

Robin nodded and gestured that she should follow him. Climbing to the top of the cave once more, Robin waited until she had joined him, then pointed into the not so distant city,

"Do you see that tower? The one shaped like a T."

Terra nodded, looking at the odd building that stood silhouetted against the bright backdrop of Jump City. Robin felt an acute nagging in his chest, anxiousness that he was going to get in trouble for this despite his best intentions and attempts at deception. Regardless, he continued, knowing this was one of the few times he could still do the right thing and perhaps make up for some of the harm he had done and would continue to do.

"The Teen Titans live there. Go to them and tell them you need their help, they'll be more than happy and capable of giving it to you."

Terra tore her eyes away from the tower and back to Robin, in equal awe of him as the prospect of help.

"Why are you doing this for me?"

Guiltily, Robin hung his head,

"You deserve their help."

Terra looked back to the city, but kept watching him from the corner of her eye.

"You got a name?"

"No."

Without waiting for a reply, Robin slunk back into the darkness, vanishing before Terra could begin to form a thank you. Again running swiftly, Robin felt better than he had in a long time. He couldn't stop the lopsided grin that emerged on his face. Just as unfamiliar as the smile he felt on his lips was the surge of elation that came with it. He'd done it. He'd won a small victory against Slade. And while he wasn't exactly sure he'd gotten away with it, the simple fact that Terra would be a Titan because he had taken this chance was enough to drown out any fear of punishment he might have felt.

* * *

Terra looked at the tower for a long while after the boy had vanished, wondering what she should do. It was certainly a tempting offer, but at the same time she was afraid to trust it. She had no reason to believe these Teen Titans would be any different from the other people who had turned her away even after promising she could stay. It was a simple fact, she could make friends easily, keeping them was another matter entirely. After all, no one wanted someone around who could level an entire city just because she had a nightmare. 

Slipping back into her cave, Terra dug into her backpack and flicked on the flashlight, glancing down at her supplies. She was running low on food again, and the nights were getting colder. She'd need a place to stay soon. She remembered hearing about the Teen Titans a few times during her travels. Apparently they were some sort of vigilante group, personal protectors of their city. In other words: Kids like her who managed to keep their powers under control.

Some people had all the luck, she thought with a trace of bitterness and more than a small amount of envy.

"Why not?"

She sighed quietly under her breath, pulling her jacket on and gathering her meager belongings. It had been too long since she'd slept in a real bed, and even if she was sure she didn't want to parade her problems in front of the Teen Titans, if they were supposedly kind enough to let her hang out for a while, she wasn't going to refuse. Stepping back outside, the girl looked over the bay at the tower again and breathed in deeply,

"Alright, that's it. I'll just see what they're like. I mean, why should I get them involved in my problems if I'm not even sure I want to stay?"

That was all this would be, she tried to convince herself, another pit stop on her endless road. Because the more she thought about the strange offer, the more cautious she was about taking it up. Better to pretend she wasn't going to the tower in hopes that the boy had been truthful, she was less likely to be hurt that way.

* * *

When Robin returned to the base, Slade was waiting for him in the main chamber. Acting like nothing out of the ordinary had happened, Robin walked in and stood stiffly. Slade inclined his head, 

"Report."

He didn't sound pleased. Which was expected, as Robin was quite obviously alone. He was worried for a moment though, there was no comment on the 'failure' in communications. Reporting in an almost monotone voice, Robin lied easily,

"She ran from me, and I pursued. By the time I'd caught up, The Teen Titans had already gotten to her. It seems they knew about her too. I realized that I couldn't gain Terra's trust by defeating the people trying to befriend her, and fell back."

Slade said nothing, which, to Robin, made it seem like his deception had succeeded. Feeling a faint sense of triumph, something he had not felt in a long time, Robin was barely able to contain the smile that still threatened at the corners of his mouth. After a long silence, Slade ran his fingers over the keyboard thoughtfully,

"Is that so, Apprentice?" Robin did not move, a warning going off in his mind. Slade continued, his eye gleaming and his voice taunting, "Because to me...it sounded more like this:"

He pressed a few buttons, and Robin heard his own voice echoing from the speakers,

"_...I know someone who can help you..."_

"All according to plan so far, although I'll admit I was wondering why you tried to turn off your communicator. But here, you seem to get a little . . . confused."

Panic rising like vomit in his throat, Robin resisted the urge to run, now knowing how Terra had felt when he had appeared before her. On the speakers, his traitorous voice continued,

"_...The Teen Titans live there. Go to them and _

_tell them you need their help..."_

Slade switched off the recording, his point made. Looking at Robin, he awaited an explanation.

Robin's mouth opened and closed a few times, as though he were trying to explain himself. In truth, his mind was blank. There was nothing he could say to defend his actions, and Slade wasn't really waiting for an excuse, he was just enjoying the absolute terror on Robin's face.

Robin knew the first hit was coming, but didn't block it. Climbing back to his feet, he quickly debated whether or not he felt like fighting back tonight. After Slade hit him upside the jaw, Robin felt a flare of rebellion. He didn't have to take this. Screaming, he pushed off the floor and kicked out, aiming for Slade's chest. Slade caught his ankle and swung him into the wall. The impact nearly knocked him out, and Slade let Robin dangle from his grip, waiting to see if he had any fight left.

Feeling warmth sliding down his face, Robin knew he was bleeding and was so used to such things by now he didn't care. Slade wondered if he had broken Robin too quickly, that had easily been the shortest fight they'd ever had, and he'd known Robin to continue fighting after such injuries with only more fervor than before them. Now the boy wonder just hung there like a slab of meat, dripping blood on the floor. Releasing his ankle, Slade let Robin drop.

"If you think you 'saved' Terra, you are sadly mistaken."

Robin didn't seem to be listening, but muttered in a voice devoid of anything.

"I know, Master."

Before he could finish standing, another kick had knocked the wind from him.

"I didn't say you could leave, young man."Slade stomped down on Robin's back, pinning him to the floor and grinding his metal clad heel into the boy's back, "Modifying my technology, undermining my orders...admirably underhanded, Robin. But not good enough."

There was no threat to the Titan's lives this time, Robin noted. This whole situation was a grand game of chicken. Slade could dangle their lives in his face all he wanted, but if he ever did kill them, there would be nothing to prevent Robin from taking his vengeance. Of course, then the Titans would be dead, and revenge would be a small comfort after the fact. Or maybe Slade was just trying to wean Robin off that particular threat in hopes of eventually not needing it.

In truth,Slade was hesitant to kill the Titans. At this point Robin had accepted the situation, he would do what he was told and he would take any punishment handed out because he didn't think he had a choice anymore. Killing the Titans would give him a choice again, and Slade didn't want to lose a perfectly good apprentice over a small indiscretion like this. Besides, plans changed all the time, and he happened to be excellent at adapting. Terra would still be his in the end, and perhaps her time with the Titans could be turned to his advantage.

"Don't think of this as punishment for disobeying me, but rather for not being able to do so successfully."

There was no point in fighting back anymore. As Slade lifted him by the front of his uniform, Robin let himself blank out, retreating to the far corner of his mind. This wasn't the first time he had been beaten, it certainly wouldn't be the last, and at this point he just wanted it over as quickly as possible.

Besides, Slade was wrong. He had saved Terra, or at least given her a fighting chance.

* * *

Ooh, Terra. 

Yeah, her real name is Tara. How deliciously coincidental. I'll probably stop using that spelling though.

Updates will be less often now, as I don't have as much pre-written and now I have to balance between Robin's situation and Terra's, which I have a feeling will be annoying.

Chapter 4 - Robin does not get injured, but may be accused of being a hedonist. Terra introduces herself tothe Titans and Slade disassembles robots.

And, for your viewing enjoyment I have for you a blooper comic! See, I can draw as well as write!

http:img50.exs.cx/my.php?locimg50&imagecomic9.jpg

There will be more of these to come. And maybe a "Did you know?" tidbit where I talk about the comics.


End file.
